Passover: Shoulda Shipped Out the Yeast AND the Beast

On Monday I drove up to my Dad’s house for Passover. Hailey is on vacation visiting the cousins not far from dad’s. So they dropped her off there as well. Strange mish-mash of folks there for the holiday as always. Dad and grandma Ethel, Ethel’s daughter and husband, Ethel’s son-in-law (longer story there), Jeannie, Felicia (a friend of the family..., “Her mother and I knew each otha since the first Exodus”), the kids, and myself.
The guys put on their Yamukahs. We sit down to read the Haggadah.
We get to the plagues, then stop. Time for dinner. What? Where’s that Moses fella? I thought he figured in here somewhere? Like in that movie with the guy from Soylent Green. You know the one. BUT NOOO, the Jews never get out of Egypt. Later on I remind Hailey that the Jews really do get out of Egypt (which oddly enough is the reason for the holiday celebration). I also assure Hailey that, “Yes, we can eat normal bread for the next week at my house.”

So, dad and Ethel have this dog, I think it’s called a ‘Mahjong Freejew’. Anyhow, it has a number of issues. One is that when the mail is dropped through the front door mail slot, the dog grabs the mail, flicks its little head and flings the mail across the room. So, all night long the adults and the kids were dropping catalogs and envelopes into the slot to see the dog go ballistic.

The dogs’ second issue is that, sometimes, on occasion, he attacks the legs of men. Attack with teeth, not attack like your thinking.

So, my brother-in-law Duane, and his wife Denise come over to pick up Hailey. They come on in to chat a while and be social. Grab some desert. Then, outta nowhere, the dog attacks. Draws blood. Duane has numerous marks on his legs. None too bad. But still.

And that’s how I spent my Passover this year.