Vietnam, the Cold War and Raising My Daughter

I work with a Vietnam veteran. Though the war was thirty-five years ago he still talks about it and hints about his experience there. The war in Vietnam is for me ancient history. Except for my co-worker I’ve no memory of it. My images of it are more from movies and John McCain then from the reality of it. When that war ended I was the same age that my daughter is now. Still I feel no connection to it.

My daughters’ generation understands little of history. This is a scary precedent. This generation has no larger framework to work through. If the Vietnam war seems irrelevant to me then what about WWII and the Cold War.

I stood in the freezer at work talking with a co-worker. Our parents and grandparents escaped Nazi Germany to come to America. Those roots and the lessons passed on to us from our parents colour our world view. What am I passing along to my daughter? A world view that promotes affluence and living without sacrifice? That was not our parents world but that became the experience for my generation.

I write in remiss. In a couple years I will have few opportunities to teach my daughter. I sense failure in providing scaffolding for this framework. It is in the context of history that we see the danger of world views such as Socialism and Marxism. In that same milieu freedom of religion and freedom from taxes and tyranny are evident.

Prior to dinner in our house we learn about a country and pray for it. Many of these countries are mired in government philosophies different than ours. The people are slaves to false religions and hollow philosophies. I sense I should explore these thoughts with my progeny while there is time. And I will spend some personal time learning recent history. If we understand our past we will know what we are up against in our future.

How Deep Does The Lion Roar?

Half a century of Octobers I’ve felt this way. This month provokes or exacerbates the warrior in me. I’m tempted to think something primal happened one October in my past. It could be the change in weather. In expectation I wait for rain and snow. I know October will bring howling wind instead. The rain and snow, the cold and crisp meet and ignite the warrior.

If spring is a season of renewal perhaps fall is one of meditation. It’s sit on the porch with cup of coffee and calculate the slant of the rain weather. Its time to grab a thermos, hat and backpack and head out to Joshua Tree. In an odd juxtaposition for my heart and soul the spirit thinks deeper when the legs are working harder. Perhaps it is this contrast between cold and comfort which calls into contrast normal life and desire.

Seems God set October up as an in-between month. Summer is over. The soul quiets for a season of meditation. The meditation leads right up to Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving leads us into Christmas.

Christmas is juxtaposition also; crying baby and suffering servant, shepherds and sheep, roaring Lion, Lamb of God. In the cold and crisp I consider these realities. In the words of Kim Hill, “Inside of you, how deep does the Lion roar?”

Small Group Bible Study

We do church wrong. When we meet together for church there is only the pastors’ voice. There is little or no opportunity to speak to one another in psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. If one is fortunate and aggressively pursues it they can find those missing aspects of community in ‘small group’ meetings. We are fortunate to be a part of one of these.

It is a mystery of the Spirit how a diverse group of people can come together and mesh. Our group is a mix of backgrounds and personalities; Dr., nurse, truck-driver, medical personnel, teachers and barista to name a few. Today we discussed prayer. It was encouraging to see the conversation ebb and flow from energetic glass half-full views to struggling, from faith-filled to frustrated flounderings. As the group discussed approaching God we operated in concert and less as selfish individuals.

When the writer of Hebrews instructs the believers not to “neglect assembling together” he is talking about much more than Sunday morning church. The symphonic rising up of hearts and voices in a small group study allows for encouragement in the context of real joys and serious struggles. All are encouraged in the process.

It is in the speaking to one another that we, symbolically, sing psalms and hymns in chorus. It is that symphony that encourages the saints. That is why we are to keep meeting together as the Day draws nearer. In the world cauchophony; saints assembling together a soul stirring chorus.

Sixteen

Today my daughter is 16 years old. Coincidentally it is also the school’s Homecoming dance. Common wisdom says that time with children goes by fast. Reality is I can’t remember a time when Hannah wasn’t around. Looking forward is the difficult part. It’s been eternity until now but eighteen is in two years.

I’ve been fortunate. I only had to deal with the usual things; throwing up food, learning to do homework, growing up and working through friendship issues. We’re definitely not done with that last one. We didn’t have the terrible twos and haven’t yet experienced the rebellion of the teen years. That one makes me hold my breath. I’ve been expecting it for sixteen years and still no rebellion (he wrote as minor chords swelled in the background). Oddly enough no matter what piece of growing up comes I’m excited about it. It’s an opportunity to stretch and grow.

Life throws a lot of curves at us. You can’t plan you just react. The initial planning for a child meant that sex was scheduled. The rest was difficult to imagine. I couldn’t fathom the love felt nor love received. From the first night up with my sick daughter to teaching her to drive it’s all been a blast. It’s been one curve that we hit out of the park.

Lines

We cross them all the time,
We say
They intrude on our freedom.
They keep us hemmed in,
Not realizing that’s a good thing.

Give us an inch we’ll take a mile,
Children;
We rail against the boundaries,
All the while
Hearts cry for safety.

We build our own fences,
Proudly,
We drive in our own stakes,
On the crumbling edge
Of precipice.

We have hewn cisterns,*
Broken,
Yet you hem us in-behind and before**,
Hinds feet
Upon high places.

*Jer. 2:13
**Ps. 18

Expecting Change

It’s been a full day. The wife worked. For me it was a day off. I went bike riding. We got news of a friend having surgery and a friend that was laid off. Dropped the kid off at school and picked the girl up after school. Ran errands, ate dinner, and dropped the daughter off at her mom’s house. I feel like I should have been in bed two hours ago. Its feeling late for nine o’clock. Fall has arrived.

There is expectancy in the air. The days are still hot but the nights are trying to cool down. We had the swamp cooler on tonight to cool down. Then we felt cold and unfolded the quilt. It’s that indeterminate period, that purgatory between Fall and Summer. The day can’t make up its mind to be hot or cool so it leans on the wind hoping she will make a determination. The sun is up late but down late enough to still feel the linger of summer evenings.

Going to wrap up blogging for the day and crawl into bed. We’ll run the fan to cool down and, guaranteed, it’ll be to darn cold in the morning. Sunrise was pretty this morning but it was another fake-out. It looked like a fall morning but there was no crispness in the air. So we wait. We wait for the weather to change and hope for enough rain to bring wildflowers in Spring. We wait for life to change and bones to heal and job situations to improve. Fall ushers in the end of a long summer. Our senses tingle and our spirit hopes for cool change.

Encouragement For The Type A Person

Some of us have to be doing something. A friend of mine broke his leg this week. He is one of those people that are always doing something; he leads a Bible study, he does security at the church, he attends the soccer games of his grandchildren. The broken leg thing is going to hit him hard.

I can relate. I feel guilty when I’m not doing something. I’m not as hard-wired as some though and I take the time for naps and lazy brain dead days. Still I have those tapes in my head. I suspect they come from the work ethic my parents set. Part of that also is that when you make a commitment you keep it. That is a good thing. The bad thing is feeling guilty when you make a commitment but for a reason out of your control, like a broken leg, you can’t keep it.

I was reading Leviticus today trying to catch up since I set a goal of reading through the Bible in a year. In chapter ten Moses is angry because Aaron and his sons burned up the goat for the sin offering when they should have eaten it. The reason Aaron gives is although outwardly he could have eaten it, his heart would not have been in the right place. He was still mourning the loss of his two sons, Nadab and Abihu. Moses ends up content with the explanation Aaron gives. Here is what Matthew Henry says, “

Our unfitness for duty, when it is natural and not sinful, will have great allowances made for it; and God will have mercy and not sacrifice. At least he thought it did very much extenuate the fault; the spirit indeed was willing, but the flesh was weak. God by Moses showed that he considered his frame. It appeared that Aaron sincerely aimed at God’s acceptance; and those that do so with an upright heart shall find he is not extreme to mark what they do amiss.

That should give us A Types great comfort. God considers our frame and our situation. It is our heart that He looks at. If our heart is in the right place than God is pleased. Even if we are down for a season due to circumstances we can’t control.

Why We Would Lose The Amazing Race

We can’t be on The Amazing Race primarily because I’m always right. If we had a disagreement on a taxi or which challenge to take my decision would be the right one. Even if my decision was the wrong one I would insist that it is the right one. I would eat crow if necessary and confess my error but en route I would be an annoying teammate.

My wife is not good with directions. She reads a map well but has difficulty orienting the map. If for example the map was upside down she would be able to tell me what the map said but it would not be correct. This has been a source of drama on all of our trips. On our honeymoon there were about two hours of silence after a heated discussion trying to find a park.

My wife is indecisive and won’t commit on many issues. I suspect she does this to keep the peace. If at home I ask where she would like to go for dinner she has no preference. This applies to a number of different issues but not to fashion. If I prepare to leave the house in black socks and sandals she has a strong opinion on that. If my shirt is not fashionable she will let me know. So if the days’ contest involves good and/or bad fashion then we will be strong.

Last but not least I blame my wife for gray areas. If I am under duress, for instance little sleep and strong competition I will get cranky. If a ticket get lost or we miss the obvious clue of the man wearing blue juggling African Swallows I will blame my wife. This isn’t a good strategy under normal circumstances and would not play out well on film in the company of others.

Despite our fantasies of being on The Amazing Race it would be horrible. I haven’t even mentioned my hatred of big bugs, gross food and my fear of heights. We would be the couple you hate, especially the controlling husband. On the first leg it is not ‘well done’ that we would hear but rather, “You are couple number twelve. You are the last to arrive. You have been eliminated.”

What Would You Be Willing To Sacrafice?

Fitting video for this blog as it is about 'doing what you love.'
 

The Long View Of Life

Those with short-sighted perspective miss the depth and adventure of life truly lived. I listen to a lot of talk radio while driving. The talk was about raising your children. As I listened I thought to myself that the remedy to key struggles was recognizing that death is coming. A symbolic death and a real death. At eighteen my daughter will be on her own. At some point, hopefully later than that, I will no longer be around. That perspective helps to raise my daughter to grow into an adult that will have to make decisions about her own life. Contrast that to raising her as if I will be here tomorrow. The short-sighted perspective or the long view.

The perspective we face life with will color all our decisions. Knowing that death looms you will take those vacations with your family. Knowing that death looms you will give all you have to give at work. Going deep in relationships is urgent. Leaving a legacy is important with death on the horizon. Thinking you are Methuselah gives you excuse to put off things til tomorrow.

The lens we use to view the world matters in both micro and macro management. Netanyahu is forced to make decisions regarding his neighbors when they threaten the longevity of the nation. Thinking that time is on your side (a la Methuselah) you can tarry in your decision. Knowing that come summer you will be forcefully blasted to smithereens incites action.

Death on the doorstep means your Judge waits at the door. As Bilbo and Frodo both learned an unexpected journey makes for quick and serious preparation. Thinking Mount Doom is forever far away opens you up to plunder.

The short-sighted man risks a useless and wasted life. Life with a long view results in action and life that “yields its fruit in its season.”

“For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For he who lacks these qualities is blind or short-sighted, having forgotten his purification from his former sins. 10 Therefore, brethren, be all the more diligent to make certain about His calling and choosing you…”---2 Peter Chapter 1