My mind gets stuck in a rut. I pedal harder and it is still stuck. I look for ramps to escape the rut but can’t find one. That is what this morning felt like. I would try to veer off toward joy and positive thoughts but kept coming back to a negative center. People were friendly and upbeat and still I keyed in on worrying about trivial issues at home and political correctness at work.
It could be something as simple as not wanting to be at work. Part of the problem is that work was slow. I had little to do and too much time to do it. So I stopped to chat and joke with fellow workers and I did all the small chores that needed doing. For lunch I bought Swedish meatballs in hopes that cow from a neutral country would cease my spin toward the negative side. Still this black tinged cloud stayed with me.
The cloud stayed with me until I got home. Once I got home I turned on Pandora, puttered around the yard and brought in the mail. The cloud lifted and connection to reality was resumed. It’s not a consistent occurrence. Today home is where the rut ended. Something tells me that’s how it should be.
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