In my most
difficult seasons I draw closest to God.
It is paradoxical; God is made most sweet in times that are most bitter. I can appreciate that God has the universe
wired this way. Still part of me would
much rather skip these seasons of testing and settle for God-lite. Unfortunately God-lite doesn’t improve
character or slam one up against one’s own pride. There’s no need for a great big God when I’ve
got little ole me running the show so-very-smoothly!
It is easy
to lose perspective. Feels like it’s
always been this way. There’s no way
out. I’ll be sucked down into the
vortex; ever spinning, more and more out of control until it all collapses. The bills are overwhelming and getting a
handle seems impossible. The
rental-property is an ever depressing source of bad news; termites,
tenant-problems, increased premiums, asbestos in the attic. To easy for it to color everything if I let
it.
Viewed from
a different angle it’s been a great month.
The wife and I had a number of weekends filled with visiting friends and
family. The daughter and I got away to
the beach Saturday where a close friend and pro-photographer shot her Senior
pics. I could write line-on-line of the
blessings experienced even this last week.
That being said I suspect I’m wired like everyone else and the stressors
overwhelm and shade all the rest of life.
I’m forced
face up against fear and overwhelmed by events out of my control. For help, for comfort, for Rock and Shield I
spend more time in prayer. Because God
speaks through His word I find in myself an increased hunger for reading the
Bible. On top of these I pile on
Spurgeon and Piper. Perspective is
gained, right focus restored—though not without struggle. In this oven of trial the sweet taste of God
comes forth. He is made sweeter in
seasons most bitter.
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